But in recent years, de Rossi began producing images of deception and at the time, that covers it. After visits to both sexuality and relationships (she is married to Ellen DeGeneres) and political leanings, Rossi, finally, disposal, which may be the last of his real life character. In the new "unbearable lightness" of his memories, she wove a terrible accounts and humanize the ongoing struggle with anorexia, a disease which threatens not only his career but ultimately his sense of self. ChicagoPride.com caught nine ShowBizQ De Rossi to discuss his personal journey through memories of what culture can do to fight the epidemic of eating regularly, and why his decision to finally clean with yourself and others may become more important.
: (Alissa Norby) In the epilogue of the book "unbearable lightness of" news, you can describe your pain episodes are often made in writing and the fact that you feel as if you were talking to me about different people. What made you finally agree the author of the book, after initial hesitation and go through the process of reviving the memory through your writing?
RDP (Portia de Rossi), I was a little hesitant only because the idea of my memory in 37 seems very excessive, and this is not my life. I thought how could I make a mess there is an interesting and exciting when I was cooking and eating or not eating, and then go on my treadmill? I think it's the most boring book I've never been able to write [laughs]. I do not tell anyone I'm not going anywhere, and I think that the materials should be full of interesting things that happen in the face. But then I realized that I write about things that happen in my head, not just what's going on in my life. I realized that in my mind there are two realities, so are completely safe and are struggling so much with my new role as an actress and TV celebrity, but actually see the celebrities, and I thought everything was fine. This character I play. There is a real me, once hid my sexuality, then this character. I really felt like two completely different people. So when I sit down to write, I realized that I do not have all the answers. I do not know how I will write or what it will really be around until I built the circuit. I know how it ends, though, it has a happy ending. But I really spend each time impact in my life, when he seemed to put the puzzle together with all the parts. It is very surprising, and ultimately so revealing to me when I wanted to write something and be overwhelmed by the truth of it. It is a series of understanding, "My God, it's time that led me to madness .." I really have not been considered previously. The thing that keeps me going is that it's like therapy to steroids [laughs]. I know I unpack all of my life, and going through it, I finally realized that this is really part of my past. I know I can cure myself of this process, and we hope to make the disorder more understandable to people who think that those who suffer, without the mind, and even make sense.
: One of the most touching themes of this book lies in the fact that living in a fantasy or role, which comes from the time your child models, for your first marriage to a man, and then you fight for "Ally McBeal", to convince us to himself and others that you deserve the attention of Hollywood. Looking back, what would you say about the importance of this type operate on the screen in your real life?
RDP: I think I just totally unacceptable. There is no way that I can correct me, or even the confidence to make decisions because I do not know what it means to be a celebrity. I do not know how to do it. So I will look for all the people around me to tell me how I should be, even when it comes to certain dress to wear. Although I personally do not like it, I was skeptical, and I thought that I do not know precisely what celebrities are to be used, and if they wear this dress, so that's what I did. I really give my best to make everyone around me, just assume that they know better than me. I lose myself in the street. I realized that I was playing a character I created this other portion of the more acceptable.
: By the way, where you allow others, especially your management team to answer the red carpet.
RDP: people made fun of me for it. But secretly, I think there are many celebrities who have a lot of anxiety about answering questions from journalists, as well as those preparing their own way, before making a talk show. They do not come for me yet. But I find them [laughs]. But when I'm alone, I have not laughed like, "Oh, that's my nature." I feel like an empty shell, a container for other characters, other people, I can not live and. I've never felt that I was safe, who am I and I have a life outside of "Ally McBeal", and his attention. I am not my true nature, because I'm ignoring my true self, so that I do feel that dry up and die in different ways, and patients. It's just that I did not trust the most. The impact of this is that I'm not sure at all, and I do not know who I am. Accordingly, I do not want to be with my friends or having to justify what I did. Anyone who knows me knows that I'm lying all the time, and it is not convenient.
: It's interesting that a large gap between your personality and identity, as people look so good for you and your character was first celebrated, Nelle Porter. I remember a young man hanged himself to tell people that I want to be when I grew up, Nell.
RDP ". Hmm, maybe not," and after reading the book you like, [laughs]. Can not be. Although I liked the character of Nell Porter, because, of course, is very strong and very interesting, there are aspects of character that really bothers me. I am very proud to be home and be independent feminist, and truly represent women in ways that are perfectly healthy. And then I had this role when I suddenly dropped my clothes and rush to my boss, asked him to sleep with me. I am very confused. I have no control over their characters go, but I feel very uncomfortable about sending messages, character. Yes, he is a lawyer who is very strong, but she was sleeping with his boss? What? [Laughs] So that the interests of me and try to get a slice of "Oh, but it's just a TV show." My close friends think I'm just too serious, but just never felt comfortable for me. I do not want to play this character and send a message. But within four years, I struggled with it.
: People in a culture often promotes the importance of sharing entertainment media, and the real consequences it engenders in our culture, especially with hatred, is currently in vogue term feminism.
RDP: Oh, listen to the word feminism has completely disappeared. No one wants to join it, because the culture has done a fantastic job a bad feminist, and that ugly is the worst thing a woman can. So, anyone associated with feminism, or someone calls himself a feminist, is considered to be ugly. So everything is finally distance themselves from the word. It's very frustrating. "Ally McBeal", as they say in this new era of post-feminism and Calista [Flockhart] is a role model for her. But what happened to feminism? And while I'm on the subject, because I'm on the subject, and this is something bothered me so much, Naomi Wolf in "The Myth of beauty," writes that the emphasis on female thinness is directly correlated with the increase in female power. In 1960, women became more confident and outgoing in the workplace and are very noticeable, but then Twiggy came almost instantly. Thus, instead of focusing on the external world and be successful, women chained to the food, and this feeling of lack of food. But you need food for thought, we all need to nourish our bodies become stronger, healthier and more energetic. That's how we live. We have to be of vital importance, and only then can we go in the world. But you should really have to do it. We have created a culture of women who are always hungry, malnourished, or guilt that they are not on a diet or ashamed to be curvier than the image of the ideal woman should be called something that is very young teenage girls who have not even been developed.
I caught his appearance on "Ellen" recently and was struck by your understanding of Photoshop, and the notion of culture, we have an ideal woman is nothing more than an illusion. However, as you detail in your conversation with her friend Ann to do the famous scene of the band Nell Porter, an idea called "normal, healthy woman" is negative. Why the concept of "normal", so that discourage you and why you think our culture women have been accepted as a bad word?
RDP: Right. This phrase, "normal life, a healthy woman" is the worst thing that can be heard. Honestly, when you look at this country and you think that the concept of the range of normal weight or normal for a woman, quite the opposite, that created this model of a thin stick We are accustomed to in Vogue. The idea to be normal to be fat, just great. A strong feeling is, the fat, you may lose a few pounds. Even the word "woman" seems to be a kind of insult is negative, because we are so accustomed to our culture in youth culture. You have to look like a girl up and down, not a woman with breasts and hips. This is what I think we should all take a step back and see what actually have to feed us. It's time to pick up where we left Naomi Wolf Twenty years ago, because the problem is chronic, we really have to deal with the epidemic. This is very unhealthy and you can see that as one of the parties in places like New York and Los Angeles women are starving themselves thin, but the whole country is actually given to the fingers and overweight. It's all because of the food, though. We must understand that the plan is not how to live a healthy happy and successful with confidence.
: Exactly. This is a serious thought to recognize that the basic terms, the word "woman" has become pejorative.
RDP: I do. I do not think I'm alone in thinking that the so-called "women" rather negative right now, because it shows that you are old, and also shows the curve. We really need to see. I mean, most men do not want to name the boy, that's for sure. I hope that people reading this book, do you think about this culture we have, and understand how things are for women.
: One of the most sensitive and timely your quotes in this book is that there is a fine line between being personally and shame. Unfortunately, we are in the throes of tragedy LGBT teens commit suicide, many victims who have heard similar phrases that you like: "It's good to be gay, but do not tell anyone they do not understand.." What do you think about it, and how you feel, young people can work in the sense that often the comments, but ultimately embarrassing?
RDP: I'll talk with my parents, I must speak with adults who believe that they mean well, and said the right thing. The best thing parents can do when a child is left for them is to have a caring relationship? So what? It's not scary, is not that important. I hope that all those who take the attitude that because of your sexuality is really a small percentage of who you are as a person. It is very important from the outset to put in perspective. The fact that my partner happens to be a woman is really not that much to me, it really is not [laughs]. Not to say that my book was interesting to read or that my career in a sense, he really says nothing. But this law, which teaches us how to treat each other. Currently, the law says to treat gays and lesbians as second class citizens, but we can see, at the age of thirteen years in the school yard and said, "You're a mean old bully." I mean, it must start at the top, with the law and with adults. Until gays and lesbians have equal rights, I think we always assume that less of the whole society, because we do it legally. So the idea that this is a fine line between introvert and comes from a conversation between me and Ellen. This concept has always been given to us when we were limited as our personal life is ours and no one knew what is going on in our personal lives. It was almost as if you keep it to myself though, in the public eye so much and gave the rest of the world. At first it seems that the right thing to do, and you'll see celebrities who walk the red carpet without her husband or the individual public and private life, and it makes sense. However, [Ellen] and I talked, the more we understand that we must feel right to share our lives, but should always be something that we should be able to do so freely and without discussion. But this is just a veiled way of saying "you live your life in shame and all that you do, make sure that no one knows about it."
: And finally, words that are unusual in your house.
RDP ". Just keep your private life private and nobody knows why you'd want to know who the hell?" This is what my mother would say, "That's all I've ever heard of him. I think he thinks he doing the right thing. Even now, he said," Sorry, but you've worked so hard for your career and you can be in the right place Why do I want you to lose. " But ridiculous to think that I can not work and earn money if I was gay, but really, I feel that my life would be me. It was then I realized, well, she did not personally about the life of my brother. Any girl who immediately welcomed into the family of the date, they say, and when she got married, it was a very important holiday of the public. But all this should be private, right?
: Of course. Nevertheless, we continue to seek to scare people in many professions, but especially the entertainment field to the left in the closet. Newsweek article last year is just one example that comes to mind.
RDP: There are many gay actors out there who still believe that they did not receive, because they have a personal life, and that's what. But all children and youth suicide, that you like, "Are not you think? It does not matter?" Because I thought it was. It takes everyone in the profession. More people need to get out, go live, live without shame and fear, and will go well. But it must be very brave little in common and the open road. And it's really the other person the duty to follow their example. [Ellen and me] to do for us, because it is the only way to live openly and honestly. But we realized that we could lose a lot because we really think about the broader significance than the social. I'm not gay role models when I was a kid, I can not see and want to be like or admire. There are no actors, no public figure or politician. No. And I'm only 37. This must change. And that should change soon.
: You often talk about in the book of your quest to feel special, and to convince others that you were special, especially pretending to be someone you're doing. Ironically, now you're out of the closet in many ways, without a script answers the red carpet, you is not never been a more famous or celebrated public. What do you think about this?
RDP: [laughs]. Yes, exactly. And you know, frankly, for the first time made me feel much more useful, and for the first time, the goal. I think that, in order that I must have common sense and have more self-esteem. It's a bit ironic that, is not it? I think we all put the face when we go out in public or work, so I hope that this book ultimately resonates with all people and to convince people to simply abandon the action, because you will feel much happier. I know what to do.
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